it's been a rough week

If KatieLyn had walked down the aisle instead of running off into the middle of the night, she'd have had a full moon the eve of her wedding anniversary.  How is that for romantic? Their celebration ought to have been over the moon.

Instead, it has been a rough week for Joe. Everyday items and occurrences spark memories of what was lost— or stolen, depending upon one's perspective.

What irks him the most are the disingenuous platitudes that they used to "explain" their situation.  Notice how I'm using plural pronouns, they and their? I'm referring to KatieLyn, the runaway bride, and her mother, Gwen.  Maybe, in order to better portray their codependency, I should fuse the names like entertainment writers sometime do with celebrity couples. Which do you like better: Katen or Gwenielyn?  I'll go with the latter.

The bromide that bugged Joe, the run-from groom, the most was their breezy assertion, "There is nothing wrong with him or his family and friends, there is nothing wrong with me and my family."   Well, Gwenilyn, you are mistaken about that.  One does not take off in the middle of the night, stubbornly rejecting the request to stay for a counseling session scheduled the next morning, if "nothing" is wrong with you. For one, it was very selfish of you. Had you stayed for counseling, issues could have been identified much quicker. Joe may have found it easier to "move on" like you wanted.

It took months of seeking the Lord to get the answer as to why KatieLyn lost her faith in the marriage, but now I can see that it was hiding in plain sight all along. The very next sentence after declaring that there was "nothing" wrong, the co-dependent Gwenilyn wrote that she and Joe should have spent more time looking at each other's environments; in other words, Gwenielyn was declaring that she should have been more worldly minded.  Having her eyes open only to the things of this world and being in spiritual confusion are the very things that destroyed the relationship. What she had proposed as the solution—spending more time looking with human reasoning, was actually the destroyer of her walking by faith.

The Lord had told me in late August of 2014 that He was preparing a wife for Joe, and that when it happened, it would happen quickly.  They met online around Thanksgiving of that year and met in person when Joe went to spend a long 2015 New Year's weekend with her family. KatieLyn would tell me that she "knew" the Lord had put them together on New Year's Day.  Joe got his confirmation from God a bout three weeks later. He proposed on Valentine's Day, using his grandmother's ring, and KatieLyn joyously accepted. The ring was symbolic of how sure we were that God was putting a family together. I would not have given the ring to Joe if I had not had total confidence in hearing the Lord on this.

For the next few weeks, Joe was happier, more focused, and had a greater sense of purpose than he'd ever had in his life.  Little did we realize that Satan was hard at work 250 miles away, injecting thoughts in KatieLyn's life while she was apart that were contrary to what God was so clearly telling me.

<< The original middle section of this post has been moved to a place of its own. My reason for having it here in the first place was an attempt to explain some behind-the-scene motivations, but I moved it because it strayed off-topic You can read it as a separate post, Financial disclosures. >>

Although it was the "nothing wrong" attitude had troubled Joe the most, the thing that floored me was the incongruity of Gwen claiming that she had had "misgivings" about the engagement, and then turning to the accusation that maybe I only "thought" that I heard God, that maybe He didn't really say what I thought I heard.

There is really no way to answer that. If Gwen does not accept that I can and did accurately hear God's voice, then she would not be able to receive my answer. Her misgivings were the result of her not paying attention to the leading of  the Holy Spirit, and apparently she is too *something* to accept the idea that other people did. I'm not sure what the *something* is in this case.  Which leads me to today's lesson—

The Lesson 🐦  
 What I learned from the runaway bride were some new Reasons People Don't Get Answers to Prayer.
When I was in youth group, I was told that God always answers prayer: sometimes 'yes,' sometimes 'no,' and sometimes 'wait.'  I think that answer was made up by someone who got a lot of "nos" and "waits." Anyway, I cannot find and solid biblical basis for that statememt.  And I know there are more than those three cliched reasons for unanswered prayer. Many reasons are knowable, and a few can be simplified to some version of "this is a test of trust."

Sometimes, as in the case with this blog, God answers by asking, "How willing are you to really push in and find out?"  It is important to remember that the Lord's standard modus operandi is found in Isaiah 28:10, For precept must be upon precept, precept upon precept; line upon line, line upon line; here a little, and there a little.

I have discovered that some prayers are not answered because we have a 'counting-on-my-fingers' understanding, or though diligence in studying perhaps we've attained a 'multiplication table' level of knowledge, but when we are in a quadratic equation place, or worse—a fractals-level situation, we won't have the wherewithal to get the kind of answer that God would give us if we did have a deeper relationship with Him. We get into stuff that cannot be figured out in the natural, and/or where we simply do not have a grasp of the proper vocabulary for asking the the right question. Our own lack of knowledge and intimacy prevents us from understanding a more complete answer, and this gap must be filled with faith.

Another one-of-many Reasons People Don't Get Answers to Prayer is their temperament. The religious word for this is submission, but that makes it sound like drudgery. Biblical submission, which is a proper combination of respect, willingness, and a teachable attitude (aka humble attitude), can lead to great fulfillment and joy, which is far removed from demeaning drudgery.  But answers to prayer may not be noticed if one's soul is not in submission to The Answerer. We cannot serve two masters; as long as were are listening loudly to our wants and looking for our terms to be met, we won't hear God's modulated voice when it comes from an unexpected direction.

It's been a rough week for Joe because last year "GwenieLyn" was unable to hear and retain her answer to prayer, and now Satan is pitching reminders of that sorry fact at him.