Measures and Portions

Paul wrote to the Romans about heart-attitudes in a Christian's dedicated service to the Lord. By way of example, he said this:

I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. Romans 12:3

The common tendency is to consider this to be a verse that cautions about pride—and it does do that, but it also reveals this truth: God has assigned an "according" measure of faith to each. A literal translation says it this way: God has "allotted" to each a measure of faith.  Let's keep reading. In verse 6 there is this:

Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, each of us is to exercise them accordingly: if prophecy, according to the proportion of his faith...

Paul goes on with his list of different gifts, but catch the way they are used— according to the proportion of his faith.  He is talking about apportionment here. God provides equal faith for salvation, but after that there are different assignments according to God's plan. Beyond salvation, your faith level depends on your hearing, your choices, and your acting on what God has said. After saving faith, not all faith is equal.

People who are faithful in a little will have more added to them. For examples of the way God works this out, see the parables of the servants who were entrusted with something of value in Luke 19:11-26 and Matthew 25:14-30.  The two parables have slight differences because they were records from different times when Jesus preached, but their message is similar; when you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones and God expands your opportunities. When you do nothing with what God gives you or bury a blessing in the ground, it displeases God.

It is also important to note that the apportionment of faith varies with the gifts and the calling. It is common to have stronger faith is some areas, especially areas related to your gifts and callings, while in other areas your faith may be undeveloped or underdeveloped. This is another reason why it is important to keep fellowship with the body of Christ that is in unity to "fill in the holes" in your own faith. It is one of the strengths of a godly marriage for one partner's faith to complement the other's faith in different areas.

As an aside, this explains why it is often easier to receive healing in a large meeting where many who have strong faith for healing are present, but then later when a person is alone, if they have not acted on and built up the faith that brought their healing, the devil can sometimes be successful in stealing their faith by teasing them with new symptoms and causing them to entertain doubts, 'Was I really healed?' and they let go of their healing.
You can see the pattern; it is a standard devilish mode of operation: (a) a goal is obtained by faith, (b) then challenged by the devil, and (c) then you have the choice between believing what God said or believing what the devil is making things look like. Believe God, keep your healing; believe the devilish symptoms, lose it and then you get an opportunity to receive your bonus problem: a hardened prideful heart. And receiving that prideful heart is easy, just scoff at the healing preacher! (Whose only role in the first place was being a conduit or vessel; Jesus is the Healer.)

Now, back from my digression—the quantity of and the areas in which we have faith are determined by multiple variables. Our prayer life, our consistency in our relationship with the Lord, our knowledge of the Word, our calling, our gifting, our heart condition, our willingness to act, and other things affect the qualities of our faith. Even when we have faith, if we do not act on it, it can die. "…faith without works is dead." James 2:26

Realizing this, we can understand a lot of what happened with the runaway bride.

Faith is apportioned according to your history of faithfulness and your assignment. Gwen was not "assigned" to get married, so it makes complete sense that God would not have apportioned any faith to her for that. As mother of the runaway, she has her own relationship with the Lord to tend to, and her role was to pursue that, not to stick herself into the middle of her daughter's relationships.

Because of the codependency, Gwen seemed to want a vicarious wedding experience of her own. We see this in the way she was reading her daughter's email and in the nits she was picking. The Lord was not going to give her that; her role was different—important, but different. This is the reason that she was experiencing doubts and misgivings. She was basically, searching amiss. cf James 4:3 "You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss…"  Gwen was looking out for Gwen's family, not for KatieLyn's family. She was deceived and did not realize that God made a distinction between the two.

Because Gwen wasn't getting any answer, in her panic she spread her fear to KatieLyn. KatieLyn had been given a measure of faith that she would need for her marriage. At the beginning, she knew that God had picked Joe for her husband. It was her responsibility to nurture that faith, to grow it, and to praise God for it. Instead, she listened to her mother, which would normally be a very good thing except that the screwy codependency was making her mom react in fear rather than faith. Fear eats faith. If the faith is not strong enough to drive out the fear, then the fear will quickly gobble up the little faith that is left. The way to get out of fear is to get into faith. It is a choice of the will and does not depend on feelings, in fact, it often runs contrary to feelings. This is why you must know God well.

When KatieLyn started listening to voices that questioned what God had told her, the thing she needed was to be inspired to walk in faith, but instead she was fed things that made her flee in fear. She cannot really blame her mom for this. According to the Bible, God had provided the measure of faith she needed, but she chose to listen to the doubts instead of casting her care on Him and deciding that she would trust Him, even in the face of her mother's disapproval.

The Lesson
Cutting those apron strings with mom is probably one of the biggest challenges that KatieLyn had ever faced, and she failed her faith test at this go-round. She was like the servant of the parable who buried what God gave her. Not everything that happens is God's will. It was not God's will for His gift to be buried; that is plain from the parable because in Matthew 25:26 the servant is judged as being "slothful" with what had been entrusted to him. KatieLyn did not exert the faith to keep her bridegroom.


(I do not have to be a psychic to see that the devil still holds one more card that he can play at his pleasure. He can rip their codependency the minute that it does not serve him anymore.)