A New Year's Post

Examine and test and evaluate
your own selves to see whether
you are holding to your faith and
showing the proper fruits of it.
~ Amplified Bible 2 Corinthians 13:5

As I come to the end of 2015 I am asking:

Has this blog really accomplished what I envisioned?
     Not really.  I thought that I would be summarizing the events in a few posts and then move on to how to hear from God. I thought that, having begun in July, that by the end of September I'd have sufficiently covered, not everything about how to hear God, but I'd have shown how KatieLyn lost (or had stolen) her confidence in hearing the Lord. 
     Instead, the blog took a different direction. It wasn't so much that KatieLyn never heard God; it was that she didn't trust Him. Time and time again, I would hear the Lord leading me back to the story of the Israelites' refusal to enter their Promised Land. 

Do I have the heart and the leading to continue?
     Those are two separate questions. KatieLyn had once had the leading to continue God's plan for her life, but she did not have the heart to see that through. In some ways, I am there now. There is one voice that says, "Stop dwelling on the past. Tie a bow on it and call it done."  That is what the devil sounds like: nice and sensible. There is another consideration: There is very little happening in the way of "new events," which means that the blog will revisit the same old ones. For me, it will be peeling away another layer, but will I be able to get that across to the reader without sounding like I'm stuck harping on the same worn out thing?
     But yes, the  leading is still there even if the enthusiasm is not. In the past two days, the Lord had opened five more verses which can be used as themes or topics. 
    

Is there anything I need to change? 
     I should put more "fun" into my posts. There are a couple of reasons that hasn't been a priority, (a) this blog deals with a serious topic where I don't usually "feel the fun" as I'm writing, and (b) even though the names were changed, the people are real. There is nothing frivolous about running away from the plan God gave you in an answer to fifteen years of prayer! Nonetheless, I should probably strive for a less heavy-handed writing style.


Where has this blog been so far?
        I have spent much of this blog examining KatieLyn's faith for marriage. She started with a field of faith. Others, who should have helped her water and fertilize it, sowed thistles of doubt instead. God's response is found in Matthew 13:

²⁷ “The farmhands came to the farmer and said, ‘Master, that was clean seed you planted, wasn’t it? Where did these thistles come from?’
²⁸ “He answered, ‘Some enemy did this.’
“The farmhands asked, ‘Should we weed out the thistles?’
^29-30 “He said, ‘No, if you weed the thistles, you’ll pull up the wheat, too. Let them grow together until harvest time. Then I’ll instruct the harvesters to pull up the thistles and tie them in bundles for the fire, then gather the wheat and put it in the barn.’”
~ the Message Bible

KatieLyn decided that a mixed field was too weedy and chucked the entire field instead of letting them grow until after the wedding/harvest.  God had an answer to her co-dependency already in the works for her. God needed her to enter into a marriage covenant so that he could "instruct the harvesters." He needed for her to be a wife more than she was a daughter in order to bring the better solution. God needed KatieLyn's cooperation and agreement before He could legally step in and do anything about it. God could not override delegated authority; He could not 'fix' her lack of faith.


What will this blog talk about in the future? 
     I probably will blog about delegated authority soon. I will be writing more about satanic sabotage; that is what broke up the engagement. I would like to go further into 'how' to hear from God; that seems to be a need. God has shown me more about the 'Excessive Sorrow' of KatieLyn's mother, Gwen. I will still talk about faith, of course, because without faith it is impossible to please God, but perhaps not so much as before; KatieLyn's loss and tossing of faith has been mostly covered. 

The Lesson
2016 is a year to walk out in faith in the plan of the Lord, to not shrink back, and to lift off and fly without being tethered to fears and doubts and misgivings that sent the bride running back to bondage.
   

A Christmas Post

Why do people love Christmas so much? 

♦ Do you love the spicy scents of cinnamon tea and peppermint candles, the crisp freshness of new fallen snow, the warm mingling of honeyed ham and straight-from-the-oven sugar cookies?
♦ Is it the music? Do you experience a dopamine high after crying about Christmas shoes? Or do you prefer belly laughing at Granny's reindeer run-over? Do you like the mesmerizing thrumming of a shepherd boy's drum? Or a stark a cappella Mary, Did You Know? 
♦ Is it the memory lane of bedtime stories about ice queens or nutcracker soldiers? About Grinches or ghosts of Christmas futures? About snowmen come to life or the hopes of lonely fir trees in the forest?  Or tales of trains, or reindeer, or hot air balloons that transport us into a world of wonder? Do you fall asleep at night listening for the jingle of sleigh bells on the roof?
♦ Perhaps you love the workplace party, including shopping for $7 sweaters at the thrift store so you can win the $10 Starbucks gift card for Most Obnoxious Outfit? Or do you prefer the requisite gift exchange where you get to re-gift the Santa cheese spreader from your last job?
♦ Maybe you like the decorating? One can never have too much glitter garland! Unpacking the old ornaments is like the thrill of opening a time capsule, isn't it?   
♦ How about the Christmas movies? Do you like buying the giant bag of Black & White chocolate drizzle popcorn at Sam's Club and plopping down to watch a movie marathon?

And what does this have to do with a runaway bride?

I will tell you!

Lots of people LOVE Christmas, but they do not want a Lord. They want the Bells and the Whistles, but not the smell of the manger. They want to feel the Joy and the Peace of a Savior, but they rebel when a Lord requires the obedience of a flight to Egypt, away from their old life, even though staying has become dangerous for them.  

When KatieLyn went running off in the middle of the night, and then told everyone that the she was in love with the idea of marriage but not with Joe, she was effectively saying that she is in love with the twinkling lights of Christmas, with the baubles on the tree, with deciding if Carol of the Bells should make the playlist, but that she chose not to stick around long enough to follow the Christ Child and walk out His plan for her life! Her stated reasoning was as flaky as wet snow. (I am not sure that her stated reason was her real reason; I tend to believe that she was following the model of her childhood training and trying to save face. If so, it did not work.) Flamboyance is not a good substitute for shallowness of words and action. 

A real Christmas requires first the birth of a Savior, but also accepting Him as Lord. Like those who love celebrating Christmas but want to skip the Baby Jesus, KatieLyn's pronouncement that she was in love with marriage but did not want a husband is nonsensical. A real marriage requires one husband and one wife. She knew this; she knew what she wanted, and if we are being truthful here, it was her mother who did not want her to be married to Joe. KatieLyn was somewhere between spineless enough to go along with it and happy to accept her mother's confusion as an excuse—it is a sliding scale of degrees, but the same issue: she had chosen to reject God's plan for her life. 

Mary's attitude toward betrothal is in stark contrast to KatieLyn's. Can you imagine KatieLyn ever having the courage to say something like this?
  "And Mary said, Yes, I see it all now: I'm the Lord's maid, ready to serve. Let it be with me just as you say." Luke 1:38 (Message Bible).
KatieLyn started out that way, but changed her choice.

Later in that first chapter, we see more of Mary's quick obedience to God.

45 Blessed woman, who believed what God said, believed every word would come true!
46 And Mary said, I'm bursting with God-news;
47 I'm dancing the song of my Savior God.
48 God took one good look at me, and look what happened — I'm the most fortunate woman on earth! What God has done for me will never be forgotten,
49 the God whose very name is holy, set apart from all others.
50 His mercy flows in wave after wave on those who are in awe before him.
~ The Message Bible

The Lesson
God's mercy is on those that fear him, who revere him. Or as Gill's Exposition of the Bible explains, "with reverence and godly fear; with a filial fear, with a reverential love of God, and affection for him." Those who want the goodies of Christmas but do not want a Lord lack that awesome affection. God faithfully keeps His promises. He called KatieLyn to be His handmaiden and was preparing a place for her.     God is faithful, through whom you were called into fellowship with His Son, Jesus Christ our Lord. 1 Corinthians 1:9. 
Gill continues: 

God is always true to his promises: whatever he has said, he will do it; he will never suffer his faithfulness to fail; and since he has made so many promises concerning the establishment of his people, and their perseverance to grace, they may assure themselves of them; and also from his having called them by his grace, for whom he effectually calls by his grace, he glorifies.

God had promised KatieLyn a husband; He was faithful and brought her one. She would have been glorified in that. She chose not to trust His choice for her. When she rejected Joe, she rejected Jesus' plan for her. When you reject Christ in your Christmas, everything that is left is worldly, expensive, or fattening. 

Item # 9721873

This is Item #: 9721873 at All Posters (dot) com. You can see their watermark in the lower right corner there. If they make a fuss, I'll remove this post, but personally, I am rationalizing that the advertising I'm providing is a fair trade-off for letting me show this thumbnail.  And I would have bought this print for the bride for whom this blog is titled— had only she not run away in the middle of the night. 

(I've bought other things from All Posters and the orders have always matched the description, arrived on time without damage, and my credit info wasn't hacked—what more could you want?)

The name of the print is 'Matilda,' and the artist is the Brit, Sir Quentin Blake. If you've ever spent time in the children's section of a library, you've probably seen his work. He has a very nice website that allows you to send free e-cards of some of his work. There is even a quirky one of a bride and groom, but you'll have to go look that up for yourself  because I've already pushed fate & copyright law about as far as I dare.  Here's how to get there: 

http://quentinblake.com → fun & free → special occasion cards

So this is the Christmas gift that never was. It is also the closest thing to a portrait of KatieLyn that this blog ever plans to publish. No, she does not have a pointy nose or underdeveloped chin, but she often has that look of delight in exploring new things in her eyes. That is one of the things that Joe found so appealing about her. She seemed happy to rummage through the possibilities and opportunities that would have lain ahead. 

Some people would look at this print and miss her expression. Some would focus on the crate and belittle her for not using an ottoman upholstered in brocade.  Some would see only clutter.

The Lesson

I hope some day to have a daughter-in-law who will see the books as possibilities, not as disarray. I hope that Joe will find a wife like the Matilda of this picture who finds joy in contemplation and contentment in the wisdom she finds. And I hope that she would find this:

His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through the knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence. 2 Peter 1:3
 

 

When Our Lips Contradict God's

"God's blessings are hindered when we let out lips contradict His Word." T.L. Osborn
whatever is in your heart determines what you say — New Living Translation  Luke 6:45
for out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaketh — King James Version  Luke 6:45

No one ever taught KatieLyn this truth: You can annul your prayer by speaking against it. Many people wonder why some of their prayers were not answered and then go on to rationalize that God must have said, "No." But in many of such cases, people cancel out their own prayer when they start speaking in unbelief. When you begin talking and meditating on doubt, you rescind what you prayed before. It works this way: Expressing doubt saps all the faith from that prayer.
Matthew 21:22 says, "whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive." Speaking doubt means that you are not believing in your heart; you have annulled what you asked in prayer.

Several posts have shown that doubt comes from the devil. You should not accept anything sent by the devil! But today, I am adding another layer to that: Doubt breeds more doubt.

When Gwen opened her yap and began admitting her lack of faith, she added to her doubt. Recall that "Faith comes by hearing," Romans 10:17. She was hearing her doubt aloud and began growing faith in her doubts. When KatieLyn heard her mother's doubts, she began having faith in those doubts too. Eventually, she had more faith in her mother's doubts than she had in what God had told her.

Doubt Breeds Doubt
Expressing doubt breeds more doubt because faith comes by hearing. Faith does not come by praying for faith! That may come as a surprise to some, but you really do not believe because you pray to believe; you believe when you hear yourself say it.
Salvation is dependent upon confession, not upon a formal prayer.  In such case, prayer is only the vehicle for the confession. "If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved." Romans 10:9. See? No prayer necessary! But you do need to make that declaration with your mouth.

Paradoxically, prayer for faith is actually a confession of doubt. Prayer for more faith is a confession of weak faith. Such prayers show that you are doubting God's promises:
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13
In all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. Romans 8:37

Gwen liked to complain about her doubts. She sought out fits with KatieLyn in order to rehearse her misgivings. Why would she do that?

That answer was astounding—and not in a marvelous way, but in a dumbfounded way. And what put me on to receiving that insight were Gwen's own words when she said she "grieved" for our family. That reaction had struck me as odd and insincere at first; now I see it as a projection of her own wants. Gwen felt left out. She wasn't getting the attention that she wanted. She felt like she was losing her matriarchal role and was being supplanted. And that is partly true because God did want KatieLyn to be promoted beyond her primary position of daughter and assume the increased authority of a wife. But Gwen never came to terms with it as her daughter's promotion; she saw it primarily as being her own loss.

Gwen pitied herself. And she took the thought that she deserved pity and sympathy, so she would glorify her doubts as wisdom. She convinced herself that her worry meant that she cared more than anyone else. After KatieLyn ran back home in the middle of the night, Gwen reveled in the sympathy she finally received. "Oh how hard that must have been for you…" She seized her opportunity to turn the situation into a power-grab and set up a triangulation where all communication had to go through her. Finally, Gwen was getting all the attention that she could. I was thunderstruck when I eventually realized that she had "grieved" for our family because that is what she would have wanted for herself.

I found her reaction to be creepy in an unstable sort of way, and part of me is relieved that Joe was spared her controlling issues. The reason I found it creepy is that misdirected sympathy nourishes the devil's ability to work in a person's life. Compassion heals, but pity destroys. Gwen's grief was the pity kind.

The Lesson
God's Word does not fail, but KatieLyn chose not to listen to and not to speak God's word. She chose to confess the fears of her mother. Her faith was limited by whom and by how much she chose to hear. The Lord had said, “Give attention to my words… for they are life to those who find them." Proverbs 4:20, 22
Your faith is measured by your words. You do have control over those. You can chose what you put into your heart by controlling your confession. When you speak about the doubts and the misgivings that the devil whispers in your ear, then you empower the devil. When you hold fast to what the Lord has revealed to you, you will end in success.

Shrinking Violet (as an archetypal trope)

(T)he Shrinking Violet is the withdrawn character, usually but not always female, who walks through the school hallways with her head down and wants nothing more than to blend in with the scenery to avoid all attention because she believes that her presence is worthless or unwanted. Often The Quiet One. Expect her to apologise a lot. She will usually be better than average in scholastic classes, and her appearance will often be pretty in a bookish sort of way.
The reasons for her lack of self-confidence vary, but they usually include intimidation by the popular ones, or being the … more sheltered daughter in the family, or … a personal event that convinced her that the world would be better off if she just shut up. In other cases, the Shrinking Violet (desires) to avoid the brunt of fights or taunts that more vocal outcasts take.
[…] the Shrinking Violet is invariably of the sweet-tempered, delicate type who makes a great friend and a lousy criticism taker.
In the end, the Shrinking Violet will always find her inner beauty and strength with the help of her newfound friends or lover, Grow A Spine, and blossom into a mature, self-confident woman. Well... not always. But generally.  (TV Tropes)

Check out the link in the footnote if you want to read the entire article at TV Tropes, but the lightly edited excerpt above is the part that applies to the Shrinking Violet-ness of the runaway bride. Keep in mind that the quote is a description of a "trope" or metaphor that is commonly used in novels, film, and poetry.

The Shrinking Violet is an archetypal character in fiction. KatieLyn is one in real life. And in a style similar to that by which fictional Violets usually buck up and bloom, the Lord had provided KatieLyn with the opportunity to blossom as well. She has no clue as to the depths to which God had prepared Joe to understand the 'shrinking violet' personality. She was blind to that provision, but as his mother, I saw it. It was one of many confirmations that they were well suited for each other.

God still wants KatieLyn to overcome her propensity to shrink back; (the proof scriptures are below,) but because she rejected God's first plan, she will probably have a harder time doing that now. That is usually the way it works: reject God and He is still there to help, but the next round often gets tougher.

But first, let's see how she matches up to the trope: 
She is female. She has a bit of an inferiority complex. She is better than average in scholastics. She is really cute in a bookish sort of way. I never personally saw intimidation by 'the popular ones,' but her mom reported that when we met. She was more sheltered than her older sister. And she would go out of her way to avoid confrontation.* She is sweet tempered and made a great friend for Joe—at first. She is a lousy criticism taker because when I treated her like a responsible adult, she said I was "being mean" for expecting her to deal with returning the wedding gifts, (or maybe her mom thought that, the triangulation thing made it hard to tell for sure who thought I was mean, probably both). She matches the Shrinking Violet trope on nearly every count.

The idiom dictionary points out that violet flowers grow close to the ground under the protective shade canopy of taller trees. That description fits KatieLyn too.  But God wants His children to grow in faith and not shrink back.

Hebrews 10:38 "But My righteous one will live by faith; and if he might shrink back, my soul does not take pleasure in him."  It is hard to get much plainer about what the will of God is— He takes no pleasure in the one who shrinks back and does not walk by faith.

 Hebrews 10:39 "But we are not of those shrinking back to destruction, but of those believing to a preserving of soul." Again, it is pretty plain. Drawing back results in destruction, and KatieLyn's shrinking back destroyed an opportunity to thrive. Believing God would have preserved her soul from further codependency.

Acts 20:20 "I did not shrink back from declaring anything that was helpful to you." The context here was Paul's farewell to the elders in Ephesus. Seven verses later, he declares, "For I did not shrink back from proclaiming to you the whole counsel of God." He did not timidly give in to the fear of consequences. This trait make Paul usable and effective in service to the Lord.

Isaiah 50:4b, 5 "He awakens my ear to listen as a disciple. The Lord GOD has opened my ear; and I was not disobedient, nor did I shrink back." This verse, like much of scripture, was written on more than one level. On its primary level, it gives some prophetic insight on how Jesus learned about his earth ministry: God, His father, opened His ear to the study of scripture and Jesus obeyed, not shrinking from His assignment. On another level, this verse gives instruction to all disciples to follow that pattern. When God has "opened your ears" on a subject, a disciple will not rebel against it. God had opened KatieLyn's ears, but he had not opened her mom's ears. (There were several reasons that her mother's ears were not opened. He has shown me three, but that is not the topic of this post.)  KatieLyn had her spiritual ear awakened to God's plan, but she shrank back.

1 John 2:28 Now, little children, abide in Him, so that when He appears, we may have confidence and not shrink away from Him in shame at His coming." This verse is more instructional than the other ones because it gives directions on how to avoid shrinking back: abide in Him. Staying close to God increases our confidence and keeps us from shrinking back. KatieLyn admitted that during the last weeks of the engagement she had not put God first, but then she wrongly blamed that on Joe! If she had put God first and abode in Him, she would be married now. If she had not wrongly blamed Joe for not putting God first, she may or may not be married, but she would have grown toward a less codependent maturity. 

The Lesson
Shrinking back is usually an outcome of having no faith or too weak a faith. The way to gain confidence in God is to seek Him out and draw close to Him. It made no sense for KatieLyn to claim that Joe was keeping her from her relationship with God. Her relationship was her relationship. Her decisions were her decisions. Her mind was her mind. Her shrinking was her shrinking. Joe did nothing but encourage her to keep her relationship with Jesus because he knew that is what strengthens a person's inner spirit. God is not pleased with a person who shrinks back and won't draw close to Him. Drawing close preserves a soul, while shrinking back leads to destruction.

But why would shrinking back lead to destruction? It seems counter-intuitive! Wouldn't shrinking back and exercising caution prevent destruction? Wouldn't playing it safe be...safer? No, not when you have been entrusted with a spiritual revelation. Not when you already know God's will. The reason is because once you have heard from God, as KatieLyn had heard that Joe was to be her husband, to act against that is to be in rebellion against God; being in rebellion is always more dangerous. To lack the courage to move forward is a cowardice of mistrust; mistrust in God is a lack of faith. This is also more dangerous.

But here is the revelation: Rebellion and cowardice will put you under condemnation for not trusting and following the Lord. Once you are under condemnation, you can no longer hear God clearly. Your ears go back to sleep.  Remember Isaiah 50:5? (see above) When you shrink back and are unwilling to act on what you know, your own heart will condemn you. "Beloved, if our heart does not condemn us, we have confidence before God." 1 John3:21.  Shrinking back will start you spinning in a vicious circle. In order to have full faith and confidence before God, your heart must not condemn you. In order for you heart to not condemn you, you must have courage and not shrink back. In order to have courage, you must muster your original confidence and faith that you were given when the Lord revealed His will for you.


Link to open TV Tropes ShrinkingViolet in new window 

* Her need to avoid confrontation was demonstrated when Joe took her to the hardware store. He is a member of the store's preferred customer club and entitled to special discounts. Because of a glitch where the store had not sent him his monthly code, he asked the cashier to confirm his membership and give him his discount even though he did not have the code. This had happened to him once before, and it takes about 30 seconds and can be done from the cash register's computer. But that day, an under-trained cashier was working who did not know how to do that. So the cashier balked at his request. He asked her to check with the manager. Joe got the discount that he was entitled to, but his "pushiness" apparently really embarrassed KatieLyn.   

Everyone Has Gifts

   God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another. 1 Peter 4:10 NLT

God has given each believer a spiritual gift. And these gifts come with the distinction that they are to be used in service to build up the church body. That means that in order to really enjoy your gift, you have to use it to serve one another.  The Greek can also be translated as "towards yourselves." These are gifts of grace that "are the common property of the Christian community, each Christian being but a steward for the edifying of the whole, not receiving the gift merely for his own use."

Can you see God's plan in this? When everyone is in the place he/she belongs, and when everyone is using their gift, then the church is missing nothing, lacking nothing. But when someone chooses to not take the place that was selected and assigned by God, then the whole church is affected. If that person refuses to be restored, then God will replace him/her. For our gift to flourish and bloom in abundance, we must be in our place; not in the place that we chose when we surveyed the possibilities that the world offers, but the place that God chose especially for us.


Positions of Prestige vs. Stations of Service

I lifted that subtitle from a sermon.² It perfectly describes one of the inner battles that Gwen, mother of the runaway bride, was caught up in—and in turn, that explains why she gave such sappy advice to her daughter—so when the bride listened to her mom more than she listened to the Lord, KatieLyn chose a source of counsel who admitted having "misgivings" over and above her all-knowing Creator. These are two directly opposed models for structuring a plan for one's future.

The first one is largely worldly; decisions are made on the basis of prestige and status: financial status, social status, and deceptively, often on comfort status. Comfort status is what an economist might call reaching "the point of diminishing returns." The idea is that a person invests effort as long as there is a positive payoff, but if they reach a place where extra work does not give them extra satisfaction, they have maximized their comfort status, that is the point of diminishing returns. To achieve a position of prestige, a person looks at available data and circumstances, and then attempts to make a logical decision.

Stations of Service, however, have a more spiritual orientation. Instead of approaching career and marriage decisions with "how much can I get out of it," the attitude is, "how much can I use my gift, how much can I give, where am I most useful?" It takes faith and a willing obedience to find those answers, to find the place that God intended for you to belong. And once you have found your proper station, it continues to take faith because service requires strength. The verse that follows the promise of a gift for service says in part, "If anyone serves, let it be as of the strength which God supplies, that in all things God may be glorified through Jesus Christ," 1 Peter 4:11. The strength for serving is also supplied by God along with His gift—He includes the batteries!

We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. Romans 12:6

The gifts are different. For years I took in only the surface level meaning of that: there is a variety, God designed each individual to be unique, and the gifts are given "according to grace." I was a bit hazy on the "according to grace" part, but had the general idea that between God's omniscience and his kindness, that it was all good. In the upheaval left behind when KatieLyn ran off in the middle of the night, I discussed this with the Lord.

"Her gifts and Joe's gifts were such an excellent balance of complements," I said, "so what went amiss?" Then something happened that is very rare. God seldom tells a person how He is dealing with someone else. Usually it is no one else's business. But this time He said that He expected KatieLyn to grow up; that the circumstances were arranged for her to grow up and become independent from her parents. Obviously, KatieLyn handled that very badly and failed her test. Satan deceived her into thinking that calling off the wedding was the "adult" thing to do. It was one of those half-truth deceptions. Yes, that was God's will for her to step into her adulthood. No, that was not God's will for her to run back to her childhood home.

Gifts function to their fullest by being in their proper God-given place. That is where they are most useful and bring the most satisfaction in their service. That is where the gift will be most appreciated by others. KatieLyn would have been appreciated beyond her wildest imagination here because her gifts are needed here. Sure, the Lord will fill those needs some other way, but that is not the point of this blog post. The point of this blog post is the lesson.

The Lesson
Every believer has a God-given gift. An adult in the faith knows that anything which causes doubt or discouragement that stops the intended use of that gift has originated with the enemy; it is devilish. A grownup faith realizes that being in one's station of service is far more fulfilling worldly prestige, and that although this choice is tough and does not produce a bump-free life, choosing to serve God will ultimately bring far more joy and real peace than pursuing a position of prestige.

¹ Jamieson Fausset Brown Online Commentary on 1 Peter 4:10
² It is in the Graces and Places series http://www.moorelife.org/listseries.php?xml=rss/GracesAndPlaces.xml 

Forfeiting Your Place

The world says, "You snooze, you lose."  God's adage would be a little different. More like, "You refuse, you lose."
Today's question is, 'Can you lose your place?' And the answer is, 'No, but you can surely throw it away.' 

Example #1 Esau
Maybe you are familiar with the story from Genesis 25:29-34 where Esau, the firstborn, sells his birthright to his younger brother, Jacob, for a bowl of red meat stew. Granted, Esau was quite hungry and truly exhausted, but when Jacob wanted to barter the stew he'd cooked for his brother's claim on the family legacy, Esau says, "I'm about to die, so what good is a birthright to me?" The story ends with, "Thus Esau despised his birthright."
Jacob went on to be one of the patriarchs of the Jews. Centuries later, Esau's choice is recorded in the New Testament writings, "…lest there be a profane person, as Esau, who in exchange for one morsel of food did sell his birthright, for you know that even afterwards, when he wished to secure the blessing, he was rejected; for he found no opportunity for undoing what he had done, though he sought the blessing earnestly with tears." Hebrews 12:16, 17.
Esau came to his senses later on, but by then it was too late to get back what he had chosen to throw away.

Example #2 Judas
Don't get mixed up in your preconceptions and typecasting. Judas, the disciple who betrayed Jesus, had a choice. He was chosen as one of the twelve. He had the position of the treasurer of the group. Compared with some of the other disciples, we don't read about much interaction between him and Jesus. But when we do, it is curious that Judas called him by the title "rabbi" instead of "Lord." This would indicate that, like Esau, he did not really value the position that he had; he acknowledged his boss as a teacher, but we do not have a record where he gave Jesus credit as Messiah.
Many Bible scholars think that Judas started out hoping that Jesus would be the Messiah who would overthrow Rome; then Judas would have a high position in the new government. They posit that Judas reasoned that since Jesus would not start a rebellion against Rome, He was not the anticipated Messiah. It is quite possible that, despite all the contrary evidence before him, that Satan whispered to Judas, played on his doubts about who Jesus was, and convinced him that since Jesus isn't really the Messiah, he would be "doing the right thing" by turning Jesus over to the Pharisees and that the 30 pieces of silver would be well earned compensation rather than the blood money it was.
God had foreknowledge that Judas would be the betrayer, but Judas made his own freewill choice. He sought out the Pharisees and had made all the arrangements before he became demon possessed. cf John 13:27.

These men did not "Oops!" lose their position through making an accidental slip, during a bout of depression, or by a having a panic attack. They threw it away because they did not respect what God had done for them, they did not value the position God had placed them in, nor did they have regard for the consequences of their action. They made a conscious choice to forfeit the blessing that would have come by honoring God. They did it all by themselves.

The Lesson
KatieLyn had been shown an abundance of evidence that God was putting her together with Joe, just as Judas was shown the miracle evidence that Jesus was who He claimed to be, but they became blind to truth that is seen with the eyes of the spirit. And yes, the devil tempted her, just as Esau was first worn down with hunger and fatigue, KatieLyn was worn down by the fights her mom provoked; and they both made the decision to find immediate relief for the flesh rather than honor the inheritance God was providing. Falling away from Christ is the fruit of choosing the relief of the flesh, over and above the blessing of God and the heavenly inheritance. KatieLyn knew she was falling away from Jesus, but she blamed that on Joe. Actually, she was falling away from Jesus because she was entertaining thoughts that did not line up with what God had previously revealed to her. She refused to value the blessing God was offering and chose to forfeit God's place for her. 

A Separate Path

God has a place for everyone, just as he has a plan for everyone. We discussed this in two earlier posts from September when we talked about the Hebrew word, makom, meaning 'the place.' Today we are going to see how to be in this ordained place, your personalized path in life, God will separate you for your calling.

One of the best known and clearest calls in all of the New Testament is found in Acts 13:2, the Holy Spirit said, “Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.”

The call on your life may not be as spectacular as Paul's, but it will have key elements in common. Some people know God's call on their life from an early age, and others, like Paul, won't see it until the time of the call. But either way, your past will have prepared you for your future. Paul had trained under Gamaliel, an expert in the Jewish law and a high ranking member of the Sanhedrin. In Acts 5, you can read about an example of his wisdom when the council had wanted to kill Peter and the other Apostles: 

34 But a Pharisee in the council named Gamaliel, a teacher of the law held in honor by all the people, stood up and gave orders to put the men outside for a little while. 35 And he said to them, “Men of Israel, take care what you are about to do with these men. 36 For before these days Theudas rose up, claiming to be somebody, and a number of men, about four hundred, joined him. He was killed, and all who followed him were dispersed and came to nothing. 37 After him Judas the Galilean rose up in the days of the census and drew away some of the people after him. He too perished, and all who followed him were scattered. 38 So in the present case I tell you, keep away from these men and let them alone, for if this plan or this undertaking is of man, it will fail; 39 but if it is of God, you will not be able to overthrow them. You might even be found opposing God!” So they took his advice.

 That was the caliber of Paul's teacher. Years later, when Paul was making his own defense, he told his audience that he studied under Gamaliel cf Acts 22:3, which would be a bit like someone today saying that they graduated from an Ivy League school. Even though Paul misused his training in his early years and would have sided with those who wanted to kill the Apostles, the point is that God arranged for Paul to have the best training in what we now call the Old Testament. 

Paul had additional preparation, at least three years, after he was saved on the road to Damascus. But once the basic training was in place and he had completed an apprenticeship of sorts, having met Peter and worked at the church in Antioch, God called him out for his life's mission. He was set apart. The church had been ministering to the Lord and fasting to hear God, and they did hear. So they laid hands on Paul, prayed over him, and sent him away.

This was very different than what happened to KatieLyn. No one in her hometown had been fasting, no one else was sure about hearing the Lord, and they were reluctant to send her off on her God-chosen path. They missed it.

But there was another difference which is even more important—
Paul valued the call that God put on his life. When he wrote his letter to the Romans, he said, "I am talking to you Gentiles. Inasmuch as I am the apostle to the Gentiles, I take pride in my ministry, I magnify my ministry." 11:13. Despite an extensive list of things that could have discouraged him, beatings, shipwrecks, snakebite, stoning, robbers, imprisonment, perils by the heathen, perils among false brethren, (see his own list 2 Corinthians 11:21-33,) Paul still valued God's call and obeyed it. He knew that he was most valuable as a man when he was serving the Lord's call on his life.

Many people want to make up their own call, and then get God to sign on. Then they wonder why they have mediocre lives when they're "doing everything for God," except that they are actually doing only the things they want to do for Him, whether He wanted it or not, and little to none of the things that He told them to do. 

For a day in Your courts is better than a thousand outside. I would rather stand at the threshold of the house of my God Than dwell in the tents of wickedness. Psalm 84:10 NASB

The psalmist declares that living just one day in the place where God is found is better than living a thousand days outside His will; and just making it as far as the threshold is better than dwelling in tents of wickedness. This is one of the truths that Paul knew that helped him keep going.

Another thing Paul trusted was that God would clearly show him the next step. Again in Romans, this time 1:17, he wrote,"the righteousness of God is revealed from faith to faith," that is, from one step of faith to the next. And the more practiced and skilled one gets in using his faith, the brighter the path.

And the path of the just is as a shining light, Going and brightening till the day is established.  Proverbs 4:18

The "just" are those who live by faith. They have accepted Christ by faith, been imputed with righteousness by Him, and are now walking by faith to complete their calling on earth. In return, God promises that their path will grow increasingly bright.

KatieLyn and her mom seemed to want the full noonday brightness before KatieLyn could "feel good" about setting out. But it does not work that way, and if you wait too long, you miss your opportunity and never reach the destination. Moreover, everyone has his or her own path once they have their life's calling. As long as KatieLyn wants to stay on her childhood path that runs concurrent with her mom's, as long as she refuses to set out on her own path, she will never be able to realize her own worth because her greatest value is on her own path. 

The Lesson
Paul valued his calling, he embraced it, and he worked at it. If you are going to develop into the success that the Lord has called you to, you have to give yourself to it. You have to separate from your training time and enter your own ministry. Without whole-hearted acceptance of the call on your life, you'll never be very good at it.

A Material Momma

Every once in a while, one can be bopping along through life and something totally unexpected pops up that perfectly fits something that you were not even considering before. It is called serendipity. That happened to me in the form of an APA interview with Tim Kasser, PhD. In fact, here is the bib on that should you want to look it up yourself:

Kasser, T. (2014, December 16). What psychology says about materialism and the holidays,
      http://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2014/12/materialism-holidays.aspx

Kasser is a psychologist at Knox College, Galesburg, Illinois. The materialism topic was originally chosen for publication as an attempt to be pertinent during the Christmas shopping season, but its relevance applies all year long. And as it pertains to the mother of the runaway bride, it is spot on.
For the most part, this blog attempts to compare real life to scripture. Today, we will compare real life first to psychology. After that, we will "translate" the language of psychology into the terms used in scripture.

Here are five main points that Kasser confirmed in the interview:

   • Materialism is commonly associated with acting in manipulative and selfish ways.
   • Materialism is associated with less pro-social interpersonal behavior.
   • Higher materialistic values have a direct correlation with unpleasant emotions, particularly depression and anxiety.
   • Higher materialistic values have an inverse correlation with satisfaction; that is, the higher the materialism, the less satisfied people are with their lives.
   • People are more materialistic when they feel insecure or threatened.¹

All of those bullet points accurately describe Gwen, the mother of the runaway bride. There are ample examples of her behavior elsewhere in this blog, so I will not belabor the points by repeating them now. Kasser went on to explain that not all materialists are spendthrifts. In fact, he identified the fictional character of Scrooge as an example of a miserly materialist, and this also would fit Gwen.

When Kasser was asked how religious faith affects materialism. He responded:

A couple of studies have found that the negative relationship between materialism and well-being is even stronger for people who are religious. This is probably because there is a conflict between materialistic and religious pursuits. That is, research on how people’s values are organized has shown that some goals are easy to simultaneously pursue, but others are in tension or conflict with each other. (…) It seems that trying to pursue materialistic and spiritual goals causes people conflict and stress, which in turn lowers their well-being.

No big surprise there. Matthew 6:24 clearly states, "No one can serve two masters. He will hate the first master and love the second, or he will be devoted to the first and despise the second. You cannot serve God and money." But I'd never thought about the connection between Gwen's professed religious beliefs and her observable materialistic responses.

The hook that materialism has in Gwen was evident early on, surely. Even so, I overlooked it because (a) KatieLyn did not seem to be obsessed with materialism like her mom, and (b) weddings can throw financial wrenches into household budgets, (especially for Gwen who has five daughters). Even though Joe was paying for the bulk of the wedding, KatieLyn's family would still be paying for their own clothing, transportation, and the baby's breath floral arrangements. It was easy to dismiss the red flags as being normal within the context of a wedding budget. After KatieLyn ran away in the middle of the night, Gwen's preoccupation with materialism became far more apparent. She was pressuring Joe to return the flowers for her and send her a full refund ASAP. Yes, Joe was standing in the return line trying to appease his runaway bride's mother at the very hour he should have been standing up saying his vows. And slowly, I was beginning to hear information no one had "shared" with me before; apparently Gwen hated the starter home Joe lives in and was sorely disappointed that it wasn't more like my house.  She also said snarky things about his cars and trucks. (He had five, three of which actually ran—it's his hobby. The exact numbers change over time.) 

When I read this interview with Dr. Kasser, it was easy to see the underlying foundations of biblical truth. What psychology calls materialism is a subset of what the Bible refers to as an imbalanced desire for fleshly or carnal things. Where psychology links materialism with emotions, (which would be the soul realm in the Bible,) biblical teachings go a step further and identify materialism as a symptom of idolatry, which occurs in the heart, or spirit of a man. (Remember: Man is a spirit, he has a soul, he lives in a body.)

After reading Kasser's remarks about his research, I can see how Gwen's materialism eroded KatieLyn's confidence in hearing the Lord, and she too began looking at the fleshly values of the soul realm (emotion/reasoning/intellect) instead of those of the spirit (heart/true essence). I can see how Gwen's materialism heightened her anxiety and kept her from hearing God clearly. KatieLyn then became stressed because her mother, not being on the same page spiritually, was not able to be supportive. I can see the association between materialism and selfishness, and that the corresponding pride would not allow Gwen to admit that others HAD heard from God when she didn't.  I can see how Gwen felt insecure and threatened by "losing" KatieLyn, and how, at a very real spiritual level, Gwen believed Joe was "taking" KatieLyn away from her. (Losing and taking are the exact words Gwen used, although she pretended to say it in jest.)

Gwen was trying to serve two masters, twice over. She had her own personal conflict with the idolatry of materialism, which she probably did okay managing until the extra stress of "losing" a daughter came along. Then Gwen had the added conflict of knowing that what was best for Gwen might not be what was best for KatieLyn.  As long as she kept thinking in the materialistic, fleshly patterns that were comfortable for her, Gwen would never have to face the fact that God had said something else. The devil, who actively seeks whom he may devour, was right there to accommodate her.

The Lesson
Materialism causes one to get his/her eyes off God. KatieLyn did get her eyes off the Lord, but it wasn't Joe that caused it. His had been the one voice that tried to get her to realize that. When she listened to her mother's doubts, KatieLyn thought she was doing the right thing by breaking the engagement. But she was listening to someone who had not heard God for all of the reasons described above, and then some. This is how Satan steals the truth. This is how Satan destroys a godly love. 



¹ Kasser referred to "research" in general terms here, not a specific citation. It could be interesting to explore the difference between the threatenings that drive people to materialism and the threatenings that drive them closer to God. Gwen did not put herself in a position to walk in the spirit and clearly hear God; she was walking in the flesh.

Worry Hurts Part II

When the devil sees a godly marriage under construction, he is going to attempt to stop it! You can count on that. He will send troubling thoughts of fear, offense, anxiety, panic, upset, anger, and whatnot. He will attempt to make sure that there is always something to be troubled about. If one thing does not work, the devil will try some other form of agitation to stop a Christian from following God. That is the devil's modus operandi: to attack God's people early in their calling.

Jesus warned his disciples about worry. cf Luke 21:34  A modern translation puts it this way, "Watch out! Don't let your hearts be dulled by the worries of this life." A more literal translation reads, "And take heed to yourselves, lest your hearts may be weighed down with anxieties of life.

Watch out! Take heed.  It is not difficult to imagine this old lesson being repeated in today's classrooms when a teacher says, "Focus. Don't worry about that distraction." The Bible makes it clear that worry is to be dealt with actively. Jesus expects us to be on guard against it.

At another time, Jesus used the technique of telling a parable to create a visual mnemonic. In Matthew 13:22, spiny thorns symbolize the worry of the world, which chokes out the blessing before it comes to fruition. These are not only worries about vulnerability, but also worries about lack and privation.

Jesus' warning was severe because the consequences are severe.

WebMD lists over two dozen physical effects of worrying! The web article points out that "fight or flight" is a typical response to worry-caused stress. In the case of the runaway bride, that would obviously be a "flight" response. But the article also goes on to say that "People who are happily married not only have greater life expectancies compared with those people who are not, but they also have fewer incidences of just about all types of disease."


Comparing a Secular 'Fix' to One Taught in the Scripture

Here is WebMD's suggestion on how to deal with the negative effects of worry:

Meditate. Daily meditation -- instead of worrying -- may help you move beyond negative thoughts and allow you to become "unstuck" from worries that keep your body on high alert. With meditation, you purposefully pay attention to what is happening at the present moment without thinking of the past or future. Meditation decreases hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline, which are released during the "fight or flight" or stress response.

Compare the WebMD quote, "purposefully pay attention to what is happening at the present moment without thinking of the past or future" with Matthew 6:34, “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble." Since KatieLyn already had heard God on the matter of marriage, she ought to have trusted Him to work it out and refused to entertain feelings of anxiety.

Note that the secular experts said that worry causes people to get "stuck" but that meditation helps. The Biblical response is found in Hebrews 12:2, that looking to Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith, and again in Isaiah 26:3, where God promises to keep in perfect peace those whose minds are stayed on Him. Trusting in the Lord is the way to overcome being stuck on worry.

But that was not the advice that Gwen was doling out. Her approach was to throw out the baby with the bathwater, and be proud that it was gone!  For Gwen, peace and relief came not by trusting in Jesus, but by getting the marriage called off entirely. Now her daughter was out of God's will on two counts instead of just one; not only had she failed the command to not let her heart be troubled, but she had also failed to marry someone God had chosen for her.

Some Science Behind It All
Anxiety interferes with intellectually demanding tasks that involve complex or abstract thought. Correspondingly, it becomes much harder to find answers to complicated questions. When a person worries, the body responds by releasing cortisol, a steroid hormone. Cortisol will temporarily stimulate the amygdala, a part of the brain that processes fear and other intense emotions. But at the same time, cortisol will impair the hippocampus, which is important for learning and processing new information so that we find it understandable. That can be beneficial for survival when faced with a sudden stressful situation, but over time a cumulative exposure to stress-related hormones will affect the prefrontal cortex, the brain's center for critical and rational thought. The amygdala commands our emotional reactions, and when the "worry hormone" levels increase, it can easily override the thoughtful, critical reasoning of the prefrontal cortex.
Basically, the cortisol that is released by ongoing worry and anxiety forces emotional rather than rational responses! The more that we dwell on doubts and misgivings, the portion of the brain used for making cogent decisions becomes more compromised and less rational. No wonder Jesus warned us to be on guard against worry; chronic anxiety destroys our ability to think clearly. Misgivings are not a sign of being a deep thinker, they are a sign of being irrational and foolish.



The Lesson
Worry is not harmless. It is insidiously destructive, like the devil himself. It destroys relationships, reasoning ability, and personal health.




Results of Worry Chart


Physical Effects of Worrying. (2015).  http://www.webmd.com/balance/guide/how-worrying-affects-your-body
 
Gross, G. (2013, March 19). Effects of Stress.  http://drgailgross.com/academia/effects-of-stress-on-the-hippocampus/

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Worry Hurts Part I

Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me. John 14:1

This one verse contains three commands. All of them are doable for Christians.
   1 Do not allow your heart to be troubled.
   2 Believe in God.
   3 Also believe in Jesus.

We have to do these three things if we love God.

“If you love me, you will keep my commandments." John 14:15

So, really, there is little choice. If we love God, we must not allow our hearts to be troubled with worry and doubt. A command needs action. Troubling thoughts must be actively resisted and replaced with the decision to believe God, and also Jesus. For all beginners and for those whom Satan is actively assaulting, this is a conscious act. Jesus realized that keeping His commandments wouldn't always be a piece of cake, so in the next line He said:

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. John 14:16, 17

You cannot have your heart turned in on worldly, fleshly things and receive help from the Spirit of truth.

"The one who has My commands and keeps them is the one who loves Me. And the one who loves Me will be loved by My Father. I also will love him and will reveal Myself to him." John 14:21

See that? If you keep the commands, Jesus promises to reveal Himself!  One of the disciples asked how Jesus could reveal Himself to His disciples but not to the world…

Jesus answered, "If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word. My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our home with him. The one who doesn't love Me will not keep My words. (…) But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you. John 14:23, 24, 26

In context, the fourteenth chapter of John takes place shortly before Jesus' crucifixion. He knows His earthly ministry is coming to term and He is hitting the high points of his teaching as a review. This one point in particular is so important that it is repeated in verse 27:

"Peace I leave with you; My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your heart be troubled, nor let it be fearful.

It is very important to control our thoughts, and in particular, it is very important to not allow troubling thoughts into our heart. His peace is supposed to fill the space that the troubling thoughts want to occupy; that would solve the first command of John 14:1, "do not allow your heart to be troubled." But it is not a fait accompli without applying the work of faith to the other two commands, believe God and believe also in Jesus.

Here is the answer on how to do that:
Rejoice in the Lord always! Philippians 4:4. Be anxious for nothing. Philippians 4:6. As Keith Moore said, "Fear is contraband for the believer."¹ In other words, fear, doubt, and troubling thoughts are prohibited under God's covenant with believers. We would not have panic attacks if we kept this covenant, if we believed the word of God fully.

One thing I have consistently prayed for Joe since his babyhood is found in Isaiah 54:14, In righteousness you will be established; You will be far from oppression, for you will not fear; And from terror, for it will not come near you. This comes three verses before the often quoted "no weapon formed against you shall prosper" phrase and forms part of the foundation for it. As a man, Joe's spirit processes troubling thoughts differently than the average storm-tossed Christian. Because of the 30+ years of tiny faith-steps that I have invested in this, our "normal" is different than what is normal for many people we associate with.  I am so used to Joe's solid foundation that I was surprised when Gwen told me that KatieLyn was hysterical. Why would she do that, especially when no one was threatening her?

I guess that is one of the lifestyle differences that KatieLyn said she could not live with. She grew up around worrywarts who would freak out over such differences, so when Joe was cooler and more collected in his thoughts, she must have believed that he didn't care. Seeing the peace of God (on someone else) often presents as "not caring" to those people who are dominated by worldly beliefs who do not understand the nature of  the peace that is the fruit of the Spirit.

In truth, there is a big, although outwardly subtle, distinction between the two kinds of "not caring."  And that distinction is made in the spirit/heart, not in the soul/emotions; which explains why it can be difficult to judge which one someone else is exhibiting. One lack-of-concern is rooted in the emotion of not giving a flying fig, but the other lack-of-concern comes from having the heart fixed on Jesus. Inside they are very different. Outside they look like twins.


The Lesson
We are given a command: Do not let your heart be troubled.  Worry is not a sign that something is important to us; it is a sign that we don't trust God and are not keeping His command. Lack of worry is not a sign that we are callous or disinterested; worry will be lacking when we obey and have peace in the Lord. 


¹Careful for Nothing sermon series, 11/20/15, 'Safe in Him,' 4:45. http://www.moorelife.org/listseries.php?xml=rss/CarefulForNothing.xml

Bird Nests

You can't prevent a bird from flying overhead, but you don't have to let it build a nest in your hair.

That is an adaptation of a Chinese proverb.  No, it is not scripture. It is what it is; so we won't look for any deep meaning but will take it at face value. At face value, it is a common sense statement.

However, birds are used as symbols in scripture. Their symbolic meaning varies with the species: the dove is identified with the Holy Spirit, a hen with safety and the gathering of her chicks, the ostrich is unmindful, the peacock displayed Solomon's wealth,  however, the devouring birds, those which snatch up seed or feast on carrion, are identified with demons and the devil.
Matthew identifies the birds of the air as "the wicked one" (Matthew 13:19).
Mark connects them with "Satan" (Mark 4:15)
Luke links them to "the devil" (Luke 8:5, 12).

In Genesis 15:11, birds of prey attempted to thwart Abraham's preparation to cut covenant with God. It is prophesied that birds will continue to live down to this foul symbolism in the future when Babylon falls and "becomes a dwelling for demons and a haunt for every impure spirit, a haunt for every unclean bird..." Revelation 18:2

As regards the proverb, "you can't prevent a bird from flying overhead," a person cannot prevent a demonic spirit from suggesting a foul, ungodly thought or putting an evil notion in his head. But he can brush it away immediately and not let it build the metaphorical nest. He can prevent his mind from becoming the home for doubts that question and undermine what the Lord has already said. Blocking the building of the nest is certainly possible.

John 14:1 says, "Do not let your hearts be troubled."  This is akin to saying don't let wicked thoughts find a home in your heart; do not let them build a nest there. Troubling thoughts come from the devil. Always. God's thoughts are peace and righteousness. Devilish thoughts are upsetting and faith-destroying. 

Not all thoughts are benign. Not all thoughts are harmless. Thoughts are not powerless. Thoughts that do not come from God are dangerous. Thoughts that come from devils are destructive and deadly.

The Lesson
A person cannot dwell in a nest of devil-inspired thoughts and still walk out God's plan for her life in faith. She won't have enough courage left to walk the path God has laid. Instead, she will run off in the middle of the night in the opposite direction, the wrong direction.

A Dimension Called Spirit

There is a dimension called Spirit that must be accepted by Faith.

Unbelief.  The Spirit of Hopelessness.  The Spirit of Fear.  The Spirit of Rebellion.  I Can't.

These are the enemies of the soul. These are enemies that enter the soul through the spiritual dimension, not the physical dimension. These are the enemies that will keep one living in the wilderness of defeat. I use "wilderness" metaphorically here, but for Caleb, it was literal.

Caleb, the son of Jephunneh, was one of the original company who had spied out the Promised Land for Moses. He reported back that an exceedingly good land. He said, "If the LORD delights in us, he will bring us into this land and give it to us, a land that flows with milk and honey."
If you've learned anything about God, you know that He delights in Faith. He wanted people of Faith to take the land. Yes, there were giants over there, but that was part of the screening process—to trust more in the Word of the Lord heard in the heart than to believe in the giants seen with physical eyes. Anyone who would do that was set up for great reward.

But what did the congregation want to do? They wanted to run back to Egypt. Do you see the parallel here? KatieLyn wanted to run back to a place that, as far as God is concerned, was no longer her home.

But Caleb tore his clothes and said, "Only do not rebel against the LORD. And do not be afraid of the people of the land, because we will devour them. Their protection is gone, but the LORD is with us. Do not be afraid of them." Numbers 14:9

Verse 10: Then all the congregation said to stone them with stones.

Those were literal stones. The stones KatieLyn's community used were metaphorical ones: words. God saw this, of course. I imagine his attitude is consistent today with His response then. "How long will these people despise Me? How long will they not trust in Me despite all the signs I have performed among them?" For the Lord had performed many signs that KatieLyn and Joe were to be married.
Here is something: In verse 22 of Numbers 14 we are told that the Israelites had put God to the test ten times and had not listened to His voice. We know from this that God had spoken; they did not listen. And we learn that they were given TEN chances before God withdrew his offer to that generation. I think KatieLyn has used up only four or five, but each refusal hardens her a little more. If she were spiritually smart, she would stop listening to those who oppose God before her any more chances slip by.

Verse 24: But my servant Caleb, because he has a different spirit and has followed me fully, I will bring into the land into which he went, and his descendants shall possess it.

The grumblers and worrywarts had a far different fate. Verse 29: "your dead bodies shall fall in this wilderness."

There is a dimension called Spirit that must be accepted by Faith. It was the Faith of Caleb (and Joshua) that allowed them to enter the Promised Land.
Since the Creation of the Church at Pentecost, God has provided a helper for us to navigate the road of Faith. Jesus called the Holy Spirit "the Helper." "But when the Helper comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth, who proceeds from the Father, he will bear witness about me." John 15:26.

Notice that Jesus calls the Holy Spirit a Helper, and not a "Does-It-for-You." I think that is one of the areas that Gwen mixed up, and therefore got KatieLyn mixed up along the way. She wanted, no, demanded to see it worked out by sight first, and then she would have believed. But Faith has never worked that way and it never will. Faith operates in the invisible spiritual dimension where it is largely unseen until after the results are produced. The only hint of Faith working before the result is seen is in the talking. Faith words do not speak of doubt and misgivings. Doubt is unbelief.

Remember the Promised Land? Hebrews 3:19 says, "and we see that they were not able to enter in because of unbelief."
They were not required to know how, or by what means, or in what manner, or any of the details. All they were to do was to walk in Faith. But to walk by faith, one must be aware of the Spirit.

The Lesson
The Faith dimension is just as real as the Flesh dimension; possibly more so, but I don't want to go off on a metaphysical tangent. We will stick to the way that scripture describes Faith.
○ John 3:31 "He who comes from above is above all, he who is of the earth is from the earth and speaks of the earth. He who comes from heaven is above all."  The Faith dimension is paired with heaven, and contrasted with the earthly.
○ 2 Corinthians 4:18 "we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal." The Faith dimension is the unseen eternal, in contrast to the temporary body.
○ 2 Corinthians 5:7 "for through faith we walk, not through sight." When this verse is read in context of the entire chapter, it is clear that "sight" refers to physical senses of the body.
○ Hebrews 11:1 "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." In the Faith dimension, "things" are a certainty, even though they are not seen in the flesh dimension.
○ Hebrews 11:3 "By faith we understand that the worlds were prepared by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things which are visible." Again, Faith is an unseen force.

In the next post, we will pick up here and look at man's control vs. God's role.

There is a dimension called Spirit that must be accepted by Faith.

Not received with honor and respect

I do not have a release in my spirit to publish today's blog in its entirety.

But I want to hold this spot on the list because these "lessons" are progressive, building on what came before.

Gwen made some remarks about regretting "giving permission" for Joe to propose.  She went back on her word and called giving consent a mistake.

This morning during prayer time, God told me that He had given her an answer, but she "did not receive it with honor and respect."

That is what happened, and I will forego adding to it at this time.
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and to God are thanks, who at all times is leading us in triumph in the Christ, and the fragrance of His knowledge He is manifesting through us in every place 2 Cor 2:14

Measures and Portions

Paul wrote to the Romans about heart-attitudes in a Christian's dedicated service to the Lord. By way of example, he said this:

I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. Romans 12:3

The common tendency is to consider this to be a verse that cautions about pride—and it does do that, but it also reveals this truth: God has assigned an "according" measure of faith to each. A literal translation says it this way: God has "allotted" to each a measure of faith.  Let's keep reading. In verse 6 there is this:

Since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, each of us is to exercise them accordingly: if prophecy, according to the proportion of his faith...

Paul goes on with his list of different gifts, but catch the way they are used— according to the proportion of his faith.  He is talking about apportionment here. God provides equal faith for salvation, but after that there are different assignments according to God's plan. Beyond salvation, your faith level depends on your hearing, your choices, and your acting on what God has said. After saving faith, not all faith is equal.

People who are faithful in a little will have more added to them. For examples of the way God works this out, see the parables of the servants who were entrusted with something of value in Luke 19:11-26 and Matthew 25:14-30.  The two parables have slight differences because they were records from different times when Jesus preached, but their message is similar; when you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones and God expands your opportunities. When you do nothing with what God gives you or bury a blessing in the ground, it displeases God.

It is also important to note that the apportionment of faith varies with the gifts and the calling. It is common to have stronger faith is some areas, especially areas related to your gifts and callings, while in other areas your faith may be undeveloped or underdeveloped. This is another reason why it is important to keep fellowship with the body of Christ that is in unity to "fill in the holes" in your own faith. It is one of the strengths of a godly marriage for one partner's faith to complement the other's faith in different areas.

As an aside, this explains why it is often easier to receive healing in a large meeting where many who have strong faith for healing are present, but then later when a person is alone, if they have not acted on and built up the faith that brought their healing, the devil can sometimes be successful in stealing their faith by teasing them with new symptoms and causing them to entertain doubts, 'Was I really healed?' and they let go of their healing.
You can see the pattern; it is a standard devilish mode of operation: (a) a goal is obtained by faith, (b) then challenged by the devil, and (c) then you have the choice between believing what God said or believing what the devil is making things look like. Believe God, keep your healing; believe the devilish symptoms, lose it and then you get an opportunity to receive your bonus problem: a hardened prideful heart. And receiving that prideful heart is easy, just scoff at the healing preacher! (Whose only role in the first place was being a conduit or vessel; Jesus is the Healer.)

Now, back from my digression—the quantity of and the areas in which we have faith are determined by multiple variables. Our prayer life, our consistency in our relationship with the Lord, our knowledge of the Word, our calling, our gifting, our heart condition, our willingness to act, and other things affect the qualities of our faith. Even when we have faith, if we do not act on it, it can die. "…faith without works is dead." James 2:26

Realizing this, we can understand a lot of what happened with the runaway bride.

Faith is apportioned according to your history of faithfulness and your assignment. Gwen was not "assigned" to get married, so it makes complete sense that God would not have apportioned any faith to her for that. As mother of the runaway, she has her own relationship with the Lord to tend to, and her role was to pursue that, not to stick herself into the middle of her daughter's relationships.

Because of the codependency, Gwen seemed to want a vicarious wedding experience of her own. We see this in the way she was reading her daughter's email and in the nits she was picking. The Lord was not going to give her that; her role was different—important, but different. This is the reason that she was experiencing doubts and misgivings. She was basically, searching amiss. cf James 4:3 "You ask and do not receive, because you ask amiss…"  Gwen was looking out for Gwen's family, not for KatieLyn's family. She was deceived and did not realize that God made a distinction between the two.

Because Gwen wasn't getting any answer, in her panic she spread her fear to KatieLyn. KatieLyn had been given a measure of faith that she would need for her marriage. At the beginning, she knew that God had picked Joe for her husband. It was her responsibility to nurture that faith, to grow it, and to praise God for it. Instead, she listened to her mother, which would normally be a very good thing except that the screwy codependency was making her mom react in fear rather than faith. Fear eats faith. If the faith is not strong enough to drive out the fear, then the fear will quickly gobble up the little faith that is left. The way to get out of fear is to get into faith. It is a choice of the will and does not depend on feelings, in fact, it often runs contrary to feelings. This is why you must know God well.

When KatieLyn started listening to voices that questioned what God had told her, the thing she needed was to be inspired to walk in faith, but instead she was fed things that made her flee in fear. She cannot really blame her mom for this. According to the Bible, God had provided the measure of faith she needed, but she chose to listen to the doubts instead of casting her care on Him and deciding that she would trust Him, even in the face of her mother's disapproval.

The Lesson
Cutting those apron strings with mom is probably one of the biggest challenges that KatieLyn had ever faced, and she failed her faith test at this go-round. She was like the servant of the parable who buried what God gave her. Not everything that happens is God's will. It was not God's will for His gift to be buried; that is plain from the parable because in Matthew 25:26 the servant is judged as being "slothful" with what had been entrusted to him. KatieLyn did not exert the faith to keep her bridegroom.


(I do not have to be a psychic to see that the devil still holds one more card that he can play at his pleasure. He can rip their codependency the minute that it does not serve him anymore.)

Hebrews - Holding Fast the Confession of Hope

The last three posts have established that (a) the devil meant to separate KatieLyn from her faith in God's plan for her marriage; (b) the devil's scheme was enabled by her mother for a variety of reasons; (c) then, like Eve in the Garden of Eden, who had once clearly known what God said to her, KatieLyn considered the lie and let go of her faith.

Today, we are going to look at the book of Hebrews to discover some of the things that could have helped her win her fight and save a husband. We will begin in Chapter 3:

Therefore, holy brothers, you who share in a heavenly calling, consider Jesus, the apostle and high priest of our confession... Hebrews 3:1

Jesus is the apostle (a delegate sent forth with orders), and the high priest (our representative in the heavenly sanctuary where he continually intercedes on our behalf) of our words, of what we confess and say.
Jesus, our officially commissioned messenger, will intercede on behalf of our confession—our words. We have to give Him something to work with. He is not going to be able to support doubt and faithless prayer. Sometimes when you don't "feel like" God is answering your prayer, the blunt truth is, yeah, you're right, He isn't. He isn't answering because it was not asked in faith. Here is the scriptural support:
James 4:3  When you do ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives...
James 1:6, 7  But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. For that man ought not to expect that he will receive anything from the Lord.
Proverbs 1:28, 29  Then they will call on me, but I will not answer; They will seek me diligently but they will not find me, Because they ... did not choose the fear of the Lord.
These verses offer three interlinked reasons, three sides of the same triangle: wrong motive, no faith, no respect for who God is and what God said.

A few weeks after KatieLyn, the runaway bride, ran off into the night, she posted on her blog—

Keep God always at the forefront, in all areas of your life. Sadly, I put mine (sic) and Joes (sic) relationship ahead of my relationship with God and that was my biggest mistake, a good healthy relationship should be leading you closer to God, not distracting you from Him.

There is a critically important lesson here in how Satan works and how he subtly twists the truth. KatieLyn was still deceived at the time she wrote this.  A God-given relationship is not, of and in itself, going to distract a person from God. It is irrational to assert that God is gives bad gifts that sidetrack a person from honoring Him and His plan for their life! In Joe's case, the engagement relationship led him much closer to the Lord as he dug into the Bible and studied how to be a good husband. It was KatieLyn's doubting what God told her that distanced her from God. It was her doubting words that went counter to what God had already said that's the culprit here.

Can you see how the enemy begins with an irrefutable statement like "keep God always at the forefront" to program the mind to agree to what comes next? A "healthy" relationship would have led KatieLyn closer to God, but the reason the relationship became unhealthy for her was because she was doubting what He'd told her! Her biggest mistake was only remotely connected with prioritizing relationships; her biggest mistake was listening to the voices that said God's plan for her life might not work, because these voices robbed her of her faith. Once that was gone, she did not know what to believe!

It was at this point that Satan, the Adversary of godly marriage, pulled out his ace and played it masterfully.  It went like this:

"Marriage is forever. Both parties need to be 100% sure. It's the only vow God allows us to make. If someone is having doubts, the marriage should not go forth." ~ Gwen

 Can you see how devilishly the truth is twisted through this narrative? We are not Mormon; this isn't celestial marriage we are talking about. It is not "forever." It is until death do us part. And one must be 100% sure about what? Sure about happily ever after? Sure about their "feelings?" I do not know what the "100% sure" is in regard to, but I do know one thing Gwen did not mean when she said that; by word and action she proved that she did not mean "all you need is to be 100% sure that God meant what He said." So the single most important thing to be sure about is not what she was referring to. The marriage vow is not the "only" vow that God "allows" us to make. It is not even the only one He expects us to keep. And if someone is having doubts... whom did she mean? the mother of the runaway?
Poor KatieLyn! Her mom had invested six months throwing around doubts, sometimes subtly, sometimes spoon-fed, sometimes aggressively argumentative, whatever felt good. And how was KatieLyn  robbed of her faith until she didn't know what to believe any more? She caught the doubt.

Hook.   Line.   Sinker.

The only winner here was the devil.

Going back to what KatieLyn wrote in her blog about about a healthy relationship leading a person closer to God, if her relationship with her mother had been healthy and given its proper place, then her mother would have known that KatieLyn heard from God, and Gwen would have supported KatieLyn in pursuing His will. That kind of  support would have helped KatieLyn have a closer relationship with the Lord.  But what KatieLyn has instead is an unhealthy codependency that questioned her ability to hear God and actively prevented her from knowing the blessings He was giving her.

Hebrews 3:14  For we have come to share in Christ, if indeed we hold our original confidence firm to the end.
The Holman Bible says, "... if we hold firmly until the end the reality that we had at the start." Holding on to what you heard from God, not letting it slip, and running with endurance are on-going themes in the successful fight of faith. When faith runs out, people become quitters. No one ever accidentally lost a relationship, but many have quit and walked away. Or in KatieLyn's case, quit and ran. 
Demoralization and disheartenment are found in the devil's armory. Like 'doubt' that was discussed earlier, they also attack faith.  But instead of creating confusion and a chaotic mind, they leave their victims in despair, and over time despair may develop into depression. Fighting the good fight of faith can be hard, but losing the fight is often harder. 

Hebrews 4:14 Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. 
Once again we see Jesus in the role of High Priest as it connects to our confession. Again we see the link between the words that we say and the strength of our faith.  Confessing weakness and failure magnifies the adversary above the Father. Words spoken in fear destroy your own confidence in God's Word. We must learn to "Talk Faith" if we want to win the fight. As 1 John 5:4 says, "For whatever is born of God overcomes the world; and this is the victory that has overcome the world— our faith."

Hebrews 10:21-23 "...and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water. Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for He who promised is faithful. 
Details are added when the same concept is underscored in chapter 10. Faith talk does not fuss or fret; it holds fast the unwavering declaration of the hope. Faith does not have misgivings. Faith words do not stew and talk defeat; they praise and believe. 

The Lesson
 It may be far easier said than done, but the basics are quite simple: Hold Fast; Talk Faith.